Hello friends I am so excited over the Moon Over the Top stoked…what other adjectives are there to give you…. today’s podcast which is about how and why to practice believing new things we’re going to talk about:
What beliefs are:
why your beliefs are made up and changeable and optional.
and how to choose to believe things that are useful to you, even if you are so used to believing an old soggy story believe something that’s for the negative or really harmful
l, and how to believe something new and practice implementing beliefs if you are easily distractible, if you have ADHD or a brain that just likes to disprove every new belief that you implant in… I got you covered. In the Badass Academy, we talk about all this belief change, and in this episode I’m going to give you the most intensive process I can in a podcast to simarize.
So… let’s jump into the episode of how and why to practice believing new things. So first of all what is a belief? Honestly simply defined, a belief is a thought that you have practiced over and over and over and over again until it feels true.
Now if you are like the lack of immediate tangible evidence, sometimes it can be frustrating! Especially if you have an ADHD brain. Because we are superworm to find dopamine. Which comes from novelty, newness, oddness and accomplishment.
shiny object syndrome when things aren’t working as fast as we’d like them to can be an extra challenge with ADHD for that exact reason.
So a quick note here on how to keep going with your goals when not seeing the tangible results fast enough … I’ll get that in a second. And I also want to offer that there is a common idea that discipline, focus, willpower and determination can get us through anything.. and yes that is true, blAnd if you are someone who does get easily distracted, introducing in these tools here of measuring DIFFERENT results, measuring DIFFERENTly leads to greater ability to stay focused, present and engaged in the process.
Beliefs are things that are passed down to us. They are things that are modeled to us and they’re things that you know we learned as children from our parents and our mentors. And then throughout life the more we practice and absorb those beliefs, the more we create evidence that they are true.
because the brain has a confirmation bias so when you have a belief ingrained in you already you are more prone to see evidence for it. Your brain is hardwired to scan for evidence to support that belief . That’s why things feel true even if they don’t make any rational sense because the more you practice it the more you find evidence for it and emotion is a glue for a belief. Like sometimes you KNOW logically that you should not be upset at yourself for only posting 5x a week because it is not useful… but if that is a thought habit you’ve been practicing, the emotional response will still be there.
So when you practice thinking about something you’re going to feel an emotion because thoughts create feelings. and we know that because every single person in the world is going to have a different experience when I say the word broccoli. broccoli is just a neutral super boring fact
and everybody has different thoughts about broccoli so everybody has different feelings about it. if it was true that broccoli was disgusting than everybody in the world would be disgusted feel disgusted when people talk about broccoli
Do Thoughts cause feelings and when we feel a certain way we act a certain way, if you’re feeling disgust said you’re going to push the broccoli away and not engage with it. this is just a really silly example…
if you are feeling disgust then you’ll recoil recoil and avoid them and don’t want to spend any time with them okay
So if you are a person that believes Joe Schmo is annoying.Joe Schmo comes around he’s going to make a joke and you’ll be like Joe what are you doing? versus the person that believes that Joe is hilarious is going to laugh at Joe’s jokes. so the more you practice believing XYZ the more you are going to believe it and build evidence for it .
it’s like this train track analogy you know? you’re building a train track you lay down 1 …. A train track component piece. and the train starts going down that route every time you think that thought.
Every time you believe the thought you lay down a new track in the train tracks. So eventually it’s going to become very easy for the brain to just be like “oh Yep this is true” it begins just going to be running on autopilot.
So when we try to believe new things, we first build another path for the train to go instead.
Say you are taking a road trip, and you start in California and you’re taking the train to Washington d.c. just imagine that there are trains for a second. but the only train available is going to Texas. you’re going to have to build a new train track if you are trying to prepare for the holiday season.
So think about how you want to be eating… Thanksgiving is coming up here. If you think to yourself “okay well every single year I’ve been eating like this, and it always is just something I have to power through,” know that you will likely have that same pattern this time around.
So of course if you continue with that train of belief, you will end up eating differently than if you were to build a new train track and see things differently.
So what you can do first is simply ASk. INQUIRE. Examine the belief and start to loosen the screws on the train track piece that are currently keeping it locked into place believe about yourself and you ask yourself
“ Is it true that you can absolutely prove without a shadow of a doubt it’s true?” like the answer is going to be no every single time. unless it’s like you don’t even let me know something okay so it’s all made up and the more you practice a sentence with them or you’re going to believe it.
and so the key to changing beliefs is to start thinking and start creating new ones. how to actually change and how to have a religious background. I believe that there are some things that are very objective and are subject to different people’s perspectives and experiences and then I also have to believe that.
Background or if you have something that you really hold tight to at something that is absolute truth what I want to offer there is I reconcile disbelief work with absolute truth.
What do I want to believe? and that question is so powerful for me because at the end of the day there’s so many things I’m not going to know the absolute truth. or not right and if something doesn’t serve you to believe it then you can change it. just because it doesn’t serve you.
so I tend to follow along with the belief that the Universe had my back. that there are forces outside of me bigger forces that support me that guide me along that give me a little bit here in there and I believe it is fun. It helps me to feel supported and helps me to feel connected to a higher power that knows a hell of a lot more than I do. and I believe that and that’s okay you don’t have to.
but I just want to offer that with all these things all of you believe, it’s just a question is it true.
that it’s true right by 5 and then is this how you spell belief do I want to hang on to it do I allow myself to believe in something else just because.
So the the first step is to constrain focus on a maximum of 10 things that you want to change out a time right so if they are working on changing your business
Maybe right now you have this belief of “business really… Hard money is hard to make. Nobody wants what I have… and you are like… nah I don’t want to believe that anymore so you write down a list of new things that you want to believe maybe you decide.
I was built for this I’m a bomb ass coach. This is fun.
These are three that I have been trying on recently. is another that I’ve been practicing.
So write down you just write down those 10 beliefs. and I like to really focus on one area.
There are some all-purpose beliefs, and then there are some that are focused on your big goal.
so the all-purpose belief is like I’m built for this you can do that in any area of your life. you can use it in your work. you can use it in your relationships in your health and fitness and your spirituality. whatever it is that you’re focusing on the right or write. Another one that I really love is I am a resilient badass feeling feeler.
This has been my mantra for like 2 years. Whenever I start to feel a difficult emotion, I tune into my body and I tell myself “ I am a resilient , badass feeling with a great butt and an amazing sense of humor” that always makes me feel lighter and more confident.
and I practice I thought probably like a thousand times at this point in time I really do believe it.
SO constrained have 10 beliefs at a time that are focused on your goal.
I recommend constraint in the number of beliefs that you work at a time because changing your beliefs just takes practice. the more you practice the more redirects the easier it gets. And if you’re focusing on trying to believe like 25 new things at a time you’re going to be redirecting each one less often. which means that each one is going to feel slower which means you are going to see the results and the feeling and the belief change slower.
The brain just doesn’t like to focus on that many things at a time even if you are like Super ADHD like me and like to focus on a million things at a time.
it still really helps to really hone in and give all of your energy to change. because I’m more often it’s reinforced the easier it gets the more you believe it the more you create events for it and the less overwhelming.
Tip two is to use apps. Apps that help you to review and refresh. Dailio and ThinkUp are my two favorites. Because you can write in those beliefs that you’re practicing leaving and you can record it in your own voice you can make different categories. if you want to have a category for all-purpose emotion or. All Purpose you know mantras affirmations thoughts whatever you want to call it or 1 for money or one for relationships you can do that and you can play all of them on a loop at a time. Or you can track them down and you can make your own.
I also love it because you got your 10 beliefs that you’re working on right and you can create Bridge thoughts or Bridge beliefs within those to help your brain get used to : maybe I could believe it.
instead of jumping from I hate myself . I love myself, which is like a brain malfunction. because it just doesn’t feel true if you really don’t believe that you were. introducing Bridge thoughts like maybe someday I could let myself, maybe there’s something about me at that level, maybe you know it’s possible that I could be, I can let other people . so I can let myself be somebody who loves me. so I could love myself right . so opening up to the possibility of allowing play possibility excitement into the process a little bit and then listening to them in your own voice I think it’s .
so powerful because I don’t know about you but when I talk to myself in my head. It’s a really loving cell talk. It feels like my actual voice that I speak with. kind of like how I’m talking to you right now. when I’m talking to myself in a really positive and nurturing encouraging way, this is what it sounds like.
when my brain is on the negative and you know what up whatever mood it kind of sounds like a robot. I know might sound weird but that’s how I like to think about it it just kind of like “Rachel you’re an idiot you know you suck at that you’re not going to do it right blah blah blah “
just like normal things that go on and I think everything but it sounds different . so when you recording your own voice it allows you to get in touch with that by yourself thinking if you want
The number three is to write down everything that you want to believe. Don’t hold back. This is more of a brainstorm. And put a deadline of when you’re going to revisit the plan on the calendar and forget about it.
I got that idea from one of my coaches, Simone Seol. and What this does is that it allows your brain to just put it into the motherboard of your system.
if you will and marinate for a little bit and when you put a deadline with that signals to your brain that this is important. or we’re going to come back to it. so pay attention and then the fourth step is to make a spreadsheet of your beliefs right. so you write down the 10 beliefs you can do in Google Drive and you can do it in Excel. I like to end up in Google Drive because then I can do it on my phone as well as on my computer. So I have 4 columns in the spreadsheet on a scale of 1 to 10. How much do I believe? Why would it be useful to believe? and what evidence do I have that it’s true.
okay cuz they’re . I columns and then the fifth one is what is my plant creating more K. What is a belief 1 to 10? How much do I believe? Why would it be useful to believe it? What evidence do I have? and how am I going to create more.
so in the morning I went through and I reviewed these. three to four times a week and I do it in the mornings. and I just go through… what is my belief here today? okay is it at 3 and. you know what evidence I have? like if I really did believe it at 10 what crazy idea would I do. So if the belief is I was built for this , you know, if it’s a belief that is a 6 for one day for example, how would I be talking about myself in terms of my goal? Would I need to believe it to make it a 10. and why would it serve me.
like if it serves me I would be certain as hell in like everything that I did I would be super resilient. I wouldn’t make big drama out of everything. I would handle things super quickly .I would make decisions .I would move on right and if I believe this out of 10 I would be believing that I can figure anything. out I’m super smart I’m super resourceful this is my calling. the people around me.
or here for me everything in life is working for me right. So just doing a really positive thought brainstorm to help you build that belief .So you want to do that 3 or 4 times a week. you don’t have to do every single one every single time. but you do want to make sure that you’re touching on each one at least twice a week.
and then the fifth step is to practice the associated emotion when you choose your belief . so I’m built for this to create certainty in my body. so I want to practice feeling certain. I like to ask myself if “if you could dance, how would it move?”
if certain had a body what would it look like. I like to meditate on it once I get that feeling into my body. I like to breathe into it. This is what feels like drumming up that emotion in your body. so that your body becomes more familiar with the process of feeling that way. and When you start feeling that way you need to take action from that place.
take action from certainty because when you do that it builds evidence of the belief.
tip number 6 finally is to have a deadline. So when you trade deadlines for beliefs , that helps to be a little bit more fun for me because. It gives my brain an objective , it helps me constrain.
I’m focusing on those beliefs. I am Super goal oriented when I achieve a goal. I love CrossFit so much because I do the thing and it’s like yes I did something amazing now that being said like you don’t always meet the belief deadline right.
so if you are practicing believing something you like okay 3 months I’m aligning that’s my estimate. if you know how long you think it’s going to take. and you maybe you’ll believe it sooner maybe you won’t but it’s not a huge deal. like don’t beat up on yourself if it doesn’t work. That’s not the point. This is supposed to be fun, right .
dance with your beliefs, play with your beliefs and then find random supporting evidence just to make it more playful right . so if you want to believe that you know there’s the perfect guy for you out there. and you’re walking on the street and it’s a really cute guy. like kind of like checked you out or something like that you could be like….
who looked like this to me it sounds a little bit crazy. I know how often we walk around finding evidence for negative beliefs that have nothing to do with us . It is crazy! so why not be delusional in a positive sense. in a way that serves you that feels good .
this is the paradoxical thing right to is that you can choose to believe something just because it’s useful. it doesn’t have to be true because like I said it’s all made up grappling. is cognitive dissonance and unwinding negative self-talk is a process.
and the Paradox is that you can exercise the muscle of just believing choosing what the belief is and like yep it’s done by releasing it. and you can do that. It’s a muscle you practice. the more you practice just being like you know what you believe. this is the better you get at it.
and because it’s one of those things that I’ve been working on with my coaches like looking at the below. How is it certainly what’s the result of creating and then just like… boom I just imagine it’s like blowing up the energy of the belief that I don’t want to have any more . sometimes it’s just like why are you choosing to believe this cuz you haven’t committed to believing this yet which absolutely blew my mind . and will forever be something that changes my life all right friends .